On Fairness and Playgrounds

When I was in gradeschool, one of my classmates called me fat. Before I could respond (a.k.a. punch this kid in the face because I do not tolerate bullies), my bestfriend interrupted and said, "Yeah, but she's... good at Math!"

My bestfriend and I still laugh about it 'til now. I love her.

I went home that day pondering on what happened, and I realized that... I AM good at Math! I'm actually awesome at Math! But I'm also fat. Awesomely fat.

That was the moment when I decided that life is fair.

If you look at life in a linear way: fat - thin, good at Math - sucks at Math, rich - poor, etc., it will seem that life is unfair.

If you look at life in just a single spectrum of a certain quality and notice yourself to be close to one end of it, it will always seem that you lack or have too much of that particular quality. Think of it as a seesaw. You may want to be on top when you're at the bottom looking up and vice versa.

But life is composed of multiple combinations of those spectra. And somehow, if you sum up all these positive and negative qualities, you'll approach 0. Meaning life can pretty much be fair.

I stuck with this idealistic point of view until I found out what makes people's lives unfair.

Remember those spectra I was talking about? When someone is too good or bad at one of those, and he uses that quality to hurt someone else, that's when the seesaws get toppled. Just like how my classmate tried to do it to mine when he called me fat.

It was easy to handle that classmate since we were all kids and we were just in a classroom. I could easily punch him in the face* and life will be fair again. But what if you have no idea how to punch? What if you're one of those people who are good at Math, but sucks at punching? What if you're too nice and the bully is too mean? What if you are your own bully? How will you restore the seesaws then?

Life is fair. PEOPLE make it UNFAIR. The people who are too good at taking advantage are the ones messing up all our seesaws. And the only way to fight (besides punching them in the face) is to look for someone who can guard your playground and put the seesaws back to normal.

Sometimes, that someone can be your bestfriend (see first paragraph). Sometimes, it can be your parents or someone you hire to defend you. But most of the time, that someone is just you.

At the end of the day, those are your seesaws and you must learn to protect them. But until you can't, find comfort in the fact that those bullies have a very special place in the playground of hell.

*Kids, do not punch your classmates in the face.

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PS: I would like to send virtual hugs to those who are being bullied and have no idea how to protect their own playground as of the moment. *HUG*

GET MAD AND DO SOMETHING

"Lagi naman kaming binabaha. Sanay na kami."

"... sanay na kami." That is our enemy. Once we say that we're used to having the same problem over and over again, we distract ourselves from finding the right solution that'll stop all this. Once we get used to the same shit happening over and over again, we try to ignore the core of the problem completely making our resistance to the problem stronger heightening the problem even more and now we're in a vicious cycle blackhole that's growing bigger and bigger everytime calamities like this happen. WE HAVE TO STOP THIS SANAY-NA-KAMI MENTALITY and start attacking the heart of the problem. I say gather the people (which in this case wouldn't be that hard because everyone's already in all-ready evacuation centers) and aside from praying for everything to be better, EDUCATE the people why this is happening. Be mad! Because this CANNOT keep happening to us. WHERE IS GROWTH if our mentality is like this? EDUCATE. GET MAD AND EDUCATE. It's hard not to point fingers, but after doing that, DO SOMETHING. Don't stop at pointing your finger to others. Let it out then DO SOMETHING.

"Bumili na kami ng bangka. Ganito naman lagi 'pag malakas ang ulan."

SERIOUSLY? People actually think that buying boats and more life vests in times of calamities like this is the solution to the problem we've been having over and over again?? WE'RE SPENDING MONEY ON THE WRONG THINGS. This cannot keep happening. We cannot spend loads of our money on relief goods, rescue teams, BOATS (for crying out loud!), etc! I'm sure everyone's heard of "prevention is better than cure". Know the meaning, memorize, THEN APPLY.


I wanted to write about romanticizing the wrath of Mother Nature. Like how She is crying because we're doing such a shitty job taking care of Her. But no. What I think Mother Nature is doing is She's getting angry BECAUSE we're doing such a shitty job taking care of Her. Wherever did we get the idea that Mother Nature is a passive creature? That She would sulk because we're not doing our job. She's been trying to get our attention numerous times and now She's angry. She's showing us what She can do if we don't get our shit together. It's not even about how hard She lets the rain pour. She's testing how we can take what She can give us. She's testing if we'll actually do the right thing this time. She's testing if we have weapons for the battle. She's testing if we're ready. I say we fight. We fight for Her because to be honest, I wouldn't wanna piss Her off [again]. I wouldn't even try [again].

"Ganyan talaga ang mga Pinoy. Nakahahanap pa ng kasisiyahan sa gitna na kalamidad." - Filipino reporter

"It's so terrible. Why is the government like this in the Philippines?" - foreigner riding a pedicab on his way to the airport

"Kahit na binabaha, it's more fun in the Philippines!" (say that to the people who lost their loved ones due to Mother Nature's wrath)

Destinies, Expectations, Hopes, Mathematics, and Physics

Destiny, what the hell did I ever do to you? Why are you fucking with me? You know that feeling when you're looking forward to something real bad and then it doesn't happen? It's like committing suicide and ending up alive in a hospital. It's like drinking from a glass of what you thought was milk, but is actually water. It's like speeding up on a street expecting lots of speed bumps, but it turns out there are none. Doesn't it feel like crap? To avoid these shit, people came up with "Expect the unexpected." But those people don't know that every human being still expect the expected. We cannot avoid it. We can only modify it. And this is why smart people came up with "Expect the worst, and hope for the best." Yes, these people are smart, but they are not compassionate. They don't know how hard it is to expect the worst out of something. They don't know how easy it is to lose hope and still expect the worst.

Yes, expecting the worst and hoping for the best work. But it's hard to apply in real life. Just like Mathematics and Physics.

PS: Sorry, Destiny, for trying to question your plans. But please make me happy just this once. Please...

Just Five More Months... Only Five Months...

My roommate told me that our landlady is bitching about my going home late all the time. She claims that I wake her up from her deep slumber because, (1) the gate squeaks like nails on blackboard (the gate that she refuses to put oil on so it wouldn't make such a shrieking noise) and (2) the stupid dog keeps barking whenever it sees something move (if they would only walk the damn dog and play with it more it wouldn't be that agitated). The only thing that irritated me so bad is when she said to my roommate, "She always comes home late. Is she even studying?" ARE YOU SHITTING ME?! You have no idea what I do when I'm outside (or even inside!) the fucking boarding house! Yes, I go out with my friends all the time (and I always tell you that I'm with them whenever I truly am), but I also spend sleepless nights in coffee shops and the frickin' library STUDYING and biting off the heads of people who would dare to distract me from it (which I also tell you)! I need an enormous table (because I like spreading my things so I can immediately grab anything) or a place not conducive to sleeping to be able to study effectively and efficiently. The/your boarding house does not/cannot offer me those things so I have to do something. It pisses me off when people (even my parents) ask me that stupid question (yes, stupid questions DO exist). It's very offensive to me because I have never worked my ass off like this before and I don't need people lurking behind me saying that I'm not doing anything or that I'm not doing enough. I mean, I'm no laude standing or whatsoever, but I HAVE BEEN A CONSISTENT DEAN'S LISTER SINCE FRESHMEN YEAR so shut the hell up and mind your own shit.

I don't need to prove anything to you. Your a powerful person in UP, why don't you log in to my CRS account and see for yourself the grades of a student who has friends (which you did not have I suppose... otherwise you'd get what I'm so pissed off about) and still manages to keep her grades up. It's not my problem that you don't get it because you're senile so just bug off. If you don't want any sound coming from your boarding house, rent it out to turtles or lizards not human beings.